Day 2……

Well it’s a gorgeous spring day in pittsburgh as most of you are aware of already. and where do i happen to be??? Sitting in at my desk with a beautiful view of a hill side and skyline. But its torture, saying please come outside and stay outside. but alas i cannot, however i am inside, not smoking, drinking soda, chewing gum, listening to various music and reading science fiction novels only because i havent made it to the book store yet to pick up books i was informed are good.
Anything to distract me while im at work.

So this not smoking thing seems to be getting easier. The cravings are becoming fewer and fewer as the time goes on. It’s hard to be sitting in front of my computer or playing video games and not smoking. Between that and work are the main times that ive smoked. It sucks sitting here being extremely nice to these people when i really want to cuss them out for being so fucking dumb and having dial up internet service still. i understand that there happen to be some areas that still are unable to get dsl or cable internet. These people i sympathize with however the cheap people that are giving me American express cards to pay for their 9.95 monthly internet service are the people i wish to cuss out. For more then one reason, it would be great to unload on someone the stress im holding in and because they are cheap asses.

However, at the same time i really just sit back and enjoy the day, its this inside war that is going on, and it feels quite epic. A calm relaxed part of me telling the wound up bouncing off the walls part to calm down and chill. I realize that at this point im just making everyone think that im insane. and ill agree with that because who isnt just a lil bit crazy inside every once in a while.
Those who tell you differently are monks or lying to you. thats the only two ways. Im most likely wrong, that seems to happen alot with being a male.

What can i say, I’m usually the first to accept the fact that im wrong and when im wrong. Why waste the time arguing when your wrong. So i went outside and walked around chewing my gum and breathing the minty fresh air, quite relaxing i must say. I think this is one of the best choices i have made. This is going to turn out good.

Chachi says: Grant me the serentity to accept the things i cannot change
the courage to change the things that i can
and the wisdom to know the difference


Til Tommorow



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